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The Alaska Stalker – May 30, 2018

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Welcome to this week’s edition of The Alaska Stalker, a semi-regular lighthearted round up of the best and worst of Alaska’s social media landscape.

 

We’re happy to announce a special edition of the Alaska Stalker, this Friday after the filing deadline at 5pm. We’ll be posting our favorite “they’re running” posts from the last few weeks. If you have any tips don’t forget to send them to akstalker@alaskalandmine.com

 

Now let’s get to it…

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Assemblywoman and local talk radio host Amy Demboski had a big announcement last week regarding Governor Walker’s winning reelection strategy. We are sure there’s nothing to her conspiracy theories. Her husband, Ben Demboski pulled a Kim Kardashian and stuck up for his woman. Problem was the execution. Typo or #metoo moment? We post, you decide.

Speaking of erections: If anyone was on the fence to run for office, I’m sure this post from former State Representative Bob Lynn really pushed them past “the point of no return.”

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Pulling ourselves out of the gutter, the SB91 jokes seem to write themselves these days. Black Bears matter!

More crime news: After a break in and theft of $50,000 in Alaska Native art and carvings, Duane Hill with Duane’s Antique Market in Anchorage purchased this Trumpesque ad in the ADN. Business has been booming ever since! Duane got himself a little earned media, a nice vacation, and some huuuge sales out of the burglary. And he got his stuff back when the suspect was arrested in April. Hopefully the bad guy watches the news. Check out this quote from KTVA: Hill said Saturday afternoon that he has a shotgun — but he was glad he didn’t run into the suspect during the break-in. “I would have killed him,” Hill said. Woah.

  

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I mean, so are we Nat. So are we. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

It’s probably too late to weigh in on the thread. The consensus was “TOO DAMN HIGH!” Nat: can we get an update on where you took the car, and how much it cost?

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There’s so much going on here: ALL CAPS, the weird grammar, and Bieling signing his name at the bottom of his own post. It’s like getting a text from your dad. Pro tip: might want to lay off on the BIG BUDDY HUGS when going door to door this summer to avoid a potential #metoo moment.

 

While he hasn’t filed yet, I heard Bieling on local talk radio this week say, (and I’m just assuming it was in all caps) “I’M COMING FOR YOU JENNIFER!!!” Very intense.

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Representative Jason Grenn is so nice. He takes the time to send a handwritten note when his constituents are LEAVING his district. Hope for his sake the folks moving in are liberals independents.

Not sure he should go door to door in that shirt tho.

If Grenn needs something comfy and current to wear while campaigning, maybe he should reach out to rival candidate for house, Dustin Darden, who just launched a new line of athleta wear.

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Did anyone reach out to Stormy?!

Also stormy – The meme of the week:

 

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If you have GCI internet, you’re automatically safe from the Russians.

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For those of you who don’t know, George Gee of Side Street Espresso is a talented artist that can do amazing things with, of all things, dry-erase markers. Gee can get political and often draws local and national political figures with his written commentary alongside the day’s latte special.  A recent work depicts Anchorage Assemblyperson Christopher Constant, highlighting a recent KTUU story on homelessness that Constant participated in.

The photo is cool. Definitely profile pic worthy. But we think it would have been a lot cooler if Constant also posted about sweet Kapua, the toddler shot during a shootout in his district. We did some stalking and over the past week counted 5 anti-Trump posts, one about a giant sink hole not even in his district, and a few selfies. While I imagine Assemblyperson Constant has far more reach in the Fairview area than we do, it never hurts to spread the word. If you know something, call Crime Stoppers at 907-561-STOP. If you are able to help monetarily, donate here: https://www.gofundme.com/justice-for-kapua  

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Spotted in Anchorage:

Grace Jang, Deputy Chief of Staff to Governor Walker, and Landmine Editor-in-Chief Jeff Landfield having a #highlevelmeeting (with drinks!) at Eddie’s Sports Bar.

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The always ethereal Julia O’Malley plunking away on her laptop at Side Street Espresso. Maybe she was checking out the Constant drawing IRL.

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It’s campaign season and that means door knocking stories are starting to circulate. One candidate was taken by surprise the other night in midtown Anchorage.

Knock Knock.

Who’s there?

Uhhhhh former Representative Dean Westlake?!

😱

😱

😱

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Jonathon Taylor, Communications Director for the Department of Public Safety, was spotted at Spenard Roadhouse with two VERY attractive ladies.

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Dimitri Shein, candidate for congress, parked at New Sagaya. Looks likes he’s following in Liz Vazquez’s footsteps. All it needs now is his face!

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The Alaska Stalker is now international!

 🇨🇳 Spotted in Beijing, China: 🇨🇳

Austin Baird, Press Secretary for Governor Walker, in a hotel bar with several members of the Alaska business delegation and, omg, German Chancellor Angela Merkel! Apparently an attempt to invite the Chancellor to have beers with the Alaska crew was quashed by zie German security. At least his Merkel meet cute was pre-KTUU accidentally accusing him of being a murderer.

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Alaska Chamber

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Overheard in Anchorage:

You folks are getting good with sending in your spotted in Alaska tips. Thank you! Now we need your overheard ins! Send them to akstalker@alaskalandmine.com

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Fan Mail:

The Stalker is becoming a must read. A REAL must read. 

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That will do it for us this week folks. Don’t forget to send your favorite social media and online goofs, gaffs, memes, dust-ups, “Overheard in Alaska” and “Only in Alaska” moments, or whatever else you got to akstalker@alaskalandmine.com Our DMs are always open. Remember: pics or it didn’t happen!

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Juneauite

It would be super cool if you would find other ways to describe women besides their attractiveness or relationship status.

Pepe

It would be super cool if you could find other places to complain about this crap, like Tumblr, where you belong.

J Y

The only way to get info about C. Constant’s FB posting since he’s blocked so many of us, lol