The Alaska Stalker – May 2, 2018

Welcome to the second edition of The Alaska Stalker, a semi-regular lighthearted round up of the best and worst of Alaska’s social media landscape. A big thank you to all our tipsters – we couldn’t do it without you! Just a friendly reminder to readers and tipsters alike: we’re striving for more of a dad joke vibe here than a Michelle Wolf roast. (Unless Jeff starts paying me as much as the WHCA. Then I’ll happily post pretty much whatever!)

 

Now let’s get to the weekly roundup:

 

This week is City Wide Cleanup in Anchorage, a time-honored spring tradition in many communities throughout Alaska. Grab your orange bag and pick up a winter’s worth of trash just in time for the hordes of white tennis shoes to invade. Shout out to Assemblyman Christopher Constant who spent hours cleaning out a homeless camp in his district with his friend, Suzanne LaFrance. Hmm. Never heard of her.

 

Not sure if liking the fact your body’s committee meeting has been cancelled is a good look. Especially on day 101/90.

Oh, you mean like spending $17,000 per child a year and being dead last in results?

Is Representative JKT (Remember: “JKT” is what, apparently, everyone in Alaska politics calls Jonathan Kreiss-Tomkins) really “Alaska’s Millennial?” Going to have to see some polling data on that.

 

Everyone’s favorite reporter, Kyle Hopkins, is always asking the hard hitting questions.

 

Are you low energy? Join former Governor Sarah Palin’s Multi-Level Marketing scheme’s down line today! On second thought, is candidate for Lt. Governor Kevin Meyer on Instagram? Maybe he should slide into her DMs ASAP.

I used to always be an unabashed fan of home grown Alaskan boys and girls making it big. Now I’m not so sure… And yes, that’s via Gab. They’re the only ones who will still have him. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Meme of the Week:

If this doesn’t make you smile you need to reexamine your life! We’d like to add Trevor Storrs as Kevin Spacey.

Glad to hear you’re okay Zachary!

Alaska Celebrity Sightings:

Everyone’s favorite New Kid on the Block, Joey McIntyre, was in Anchorage last week performing in Anchorage Concert Association’s (#itsbetterlive) Broadway show Cabaret. Joey gave Alaska some major love on Instagram. IDK what “Artic Airbourne” is tho. Pro tip Joey: come back to Anchorage in the summer sometime! #itsbetterinJune

Overheard in Juneau:

“You’re really intimidating, but it’s okay because you’re pretty.” – A male (shocking, I know) politico to a female staffer last weekend.

 

Fan Mail:

“I don’t know much in life, but I know the Alaska Stalker is a dude.” Thanks for the compliment! XOXO -AK Stalker

 

That will do it for us this week folks. Don’t forget to send your favorite social media and online goofs, gaffs, memes, dust-ups, “Overheard in Alaska” and “Only in Alaska” moments, or whatever else you got to akstalker@alaskalandmine.com Our DMs are always open. Remember: pics or it didn’t happen!

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