Welcome to this week’s edition of The Alaska Stalker, a lighthearted round up of the best and worst of Alaska’s social media landscape. Have you sent us a hot tip yet? Email us at email@example.com and, as always, thanks for reading.
Ahhh it’s good to be back. Remember when Bill Walker was Governor? That was 10 days ago. It seems like 10 years. Let’s throw it back to simpler, pre-quake times with this Tweet.
🎶 The aftershocks don’t bother me anyway… 🎶
I don’t know about you, but I am quake-memed out. Instead, let’s take a non-meme related look back at what you might have missed since “the big one.”
Lucky for us, the cutting edge “DeLena Earthquake Tweet Emergency Alert System” was in place. Or maybe it was just another “Deep Tweets with DeLena.” We never know with her. ¯\
While I’m sure you all saw this tweet from POTUS, did you see Senator-elect Scott Kawasaki’s response? What a statesman. 🙄 Also, Scott, everyone knows the earthquake was caused by a lack of raked snow. It had nothing to do with large tremor-producing worms.
A take so hot even Andrew Halcro can’t find fault with it. 🥇
Alice makes a bold prediction for an uptick in babies born on or abouts 8/23/19. I’m actually pretty disappointed in the local media for not publishing a “born during the earthquake story.” I know of at least one baby that fits the bill. Media: mark Friday, August 23, 2019 on your calendars for a quakebaby follow up!
#EveryVoteMatters. I count 8 votes. Looks kind of fishy to me. Unless… Does John live in District 15? What ever happened to that investigation anyway?
Representative Kopp had a real moment during the earthquake, and wrote a novel about it on Facebook. Buried in the middle was this gem – a retelling of how as a young boy he fell out of his dad’s fishing boat into Bristol Bay. I had no idea Chuck Kopp was the inspiration behind Tom Bodett’s Norman Tuttle!
Looks like Assemblymember Eric Croft’s son’s room suffered some serious quake damage.
🚨🚨🚨 Dad joke alert!!! 🚨🚨🚨 This one had us shaking!
In all seriousness, some Southcentral politicos suffered moderate to severe damage to their homes. Cody Huggins set up a Go Fund Me campaign to assist his dad, former Senator Charlie Huggins, with the damage to his home.
Over in Sand Lake, former candidate for Assembly and School Board, Nikki Rose, is raising money to repair damage to the home she lives in as a tenant. Looks like the place has some serious issues. I hope the homeowner is able to get the place fixed for the Rose family ASAP.
Even Sarah Palin and family weren’t immune.
If anyone’s home is damaged beyond repair, here’s a recent listing of a place for rent at a good price. From the look of the photos, it might not have indoor plumbing. It’s also, unsurprisingly, in Fairbanks. #yellowsnow
And now for one of our fav earthquake stories: Anchorage Mayor Ethan Berkowitz participated in the popular “No Shave November” movement to help raise money for cancer awareness. His big, furry reveal was derailed on the morning of November 30th by “the big one.” Instead of posing with his beard for Instagrams all day, the Mayor had to do tons of press conferences, FB lives, interviews, etc. all with a full beard. Hilarious! Pretty sure he went home and shaved as soon as he could. Check out the transformation. 🧔
While Eagle River seems to have been hit hardest by November’s quake, those Eagle River Representatives continue to
come together drop bombs on one another on social media. 💣💣💣 With Representative Lora Reinbold about to become Senator Lora Reinbold, and Representative Dan Saddler moving on to DNR, it might be time to take one out of the Walker playbook and, 🎶 “Let it go!” 🎶
The world didn’t stop after the earthquake. Mike Dunleavy was sworn in as Governor on December 3rd. Whomever made this typo better still be embarrassed.
Many folks blamed the earthquake on the earth retaliating against Alaskans for electing Governor Dunleavy. Maybe. Or maybe it’s because folks didn’t make that loyalty pledge in time!
Some people are even comparing the Dunleavy administration to a YA fiction novel in which youths fight to the death during a nationally televised event called the Hunger Games, until only one remains.
So, basically, Representative David Eastman’s entire strategy.
Looking for a last minute Christmas gift? The Stalker Holiday Gift Guide has you covered. First up, make someone’s dreams come true with an Alaska Chamber membership???
You can always buy one of Former Anchorage Mayor Rick Mystrom’s books on living with Diabetes for all the Type 2’s in your life. Dictator jacket not included.
If you know any “very fine people” with lots of goodwill in their hearts, follow former house candidate Eileen Patterson’s lead and get them Rules for Radicals.
On a more serious note, don’t forget to check out our great local businesses – especially liquor and wine stores – that might need some extra help during a post-earthquake holiday season. Representative Les Gara has a great FB thread on some locally owned options.
Just don’t forget to BYOBag. Looking forward to hearing more about the proposed changes to the Anchorage plastic bag ban at the upcoming Assembly meetings. Word on the street is plastic sleeves to protect comic books are going to be permitted. Imagine that!
Gotta hand it to candidate for Anchorage Assembly, Meg Zaletel. She practices what she preaches. ♻️
Meanwhile, over in West Anchorage, a new assembly candidate is born. We’d been wondering about Assemblymember Croft ever since a little bird told us he bought a place downtown. See, the Stalker can keep a secret after all!
And, not to be outdone, Assemblymember John Weddleton is already going door-to-door making spirited campaign promises.
IDK who Wammie Tilson is, but she’s a Twitter hero. To be fair, I only muted @VotingFemale. My #akleg is pure once more!
Oh look, Fairbanks City Council is going through the hell that is public comment period during a proposed anti-discrimination ordinance. It’s been delayed until February. It only took Anchorage 5 tries over 4 decades. Pro tip: it never gets easier. Just vote already!
Is it just me, or does anyone else want to be BFF with Craig Medred? Can someone set that up for me?
Representative Les Gara apologizing to Senator Pete Kelly is a thing that actually happened. “Sorry Pete!” I never thought I’d see the day!
Les isn’t the only one being a good sport about his mistakes these days. While the Scrabble aficionado in me is disappointed the Hall household doesn’t adhere to the Official Scrabble Dictionary, it’s good to see Vince Beltrami make light of the most epic typo in Alaska history.
“In the last 2 weeks our fan girl Landmine group text has been total fire. They really have the knives out. We can’t get enough!” Thanks, ladies!
Spotted at the market: Mayor Dan getting some late night bread, tomatoes, and sesame chicken. Our source was unsure if Mayor Dan was starting his day, or ending it.
Spotted at Josh Revak’s graduation party (BA and MBA from APU): Representative Cathy Tilton
Cathy was also spotted picking out office spaces for members in Juneau last week. Can someone say “premature organization?”
Spotted at the Stalker’s parents’ house, after walking by it for the past 30+ years without noticing the plaque on the back: the executive chair of Ernest “Greuning,” Governor of Alaska 1939-1952, U.S. Senator 1959-1968. We’re not quite sure where it came from. Anyone know? I mean, with the last name spelled wrong, is it even legit?