Ask a Cat: Wedding invitations, mustaches, and cat toys

Ever feel like your problems could only be solved by a deeply wise house cat? Have an Ask a Cat sticker shaped hole in your heart? Seek the Cat, and Cat shall provide: Reach out anonymously here or e-mail

Dear Cat,

Long time reader, second time question-asker here. I got an invitation already for a wedding that is late this coming summer. Is this normal now? Also, they want an RSVP within the next two months. The thing is, they gave me a +1 on the invite. I’m not dating anyone, but I also don’t know a lot of people at this wedding. Is it cool to just RSVP a + 1 I haven’t met yet? Is that just greedy?

Dear Human,

Ahhh, wedding season in Alaska. For those that wish to wed under the midnight sun, Cat suspects the planning is frantic and the time is short. So, no, I am not surprised that you received an invitation before the snow has stopped falling. As for your yet to be named guest; Cat thinks what is more important to the couple is the head count vs. who the head belongs to. When a couple sends an invite with a “+ 1” they should fully accept that you may bring a current fling, an old friend with benefits, or your Mom.

Cat encourages you to use common sense. Do not bring a guest that you know is a former lover of the bride or the groom’s estranged brother. As long as your plus one doesn’t make a scene or an unwelcome speech at the event, you can rest assured that the bride and groom will likely be very focused on themselves that day. As to your question if this is greedy or not: no. If they didn’t want you to bring a date, they would have simply addressed the invitation to you alone. Accept the invite of a companion and enjoy the event. 


Dear Cat,

I matched with a guy on Bumble that seems nice enough. The problem? He has a really awful mustache. I know that’s shallow, but also I don’t have the energy to try and change a guy. Should I keep chatting with him or just bow out?

Dear Human,

Cat thinks this depends on the severity of the mustache. Is this a Jeff Landfield mustache (purrhaps a passing phase meant to shock and entertain?) Or is this a Tom Selleck style ‘stache  (i.e. a lifetime commitment with a personality all its own.) A little light mustache banter might reveal how committed this gentleman is to his facial hair stylings. While it’s very important to be attracted to someone you consider dating, always consider the mind and heart behind the mustache. If you two matched, Cat assumes there was something about his dating profile that you found attractive. You might enjoy getting to know this guy and find that it no longer bothers you.

If, however, the mere thought of this mustache disturbs you in your soul and you lose sleep over it, purrhaps this is not the guy for you. Also consider if you are using the mustache as an excuse when there is something else about this man that doesn’t feel right? Modern dating comes with all sorts of risks. If you bow out early you may be missing out on a great guy. If you invest more time in this person by going out on dates, but still find that you cannot get past his appearance, you increase the chance of hurt feelings from both parties. Cat tends to lean more towards getting to know mustache man a little better before writing him off. 


Dear Cat,

Why do cats ignore nice cat toys that are expensive and prefer old Amazon boxes?

Dear Human,

You ask Cat an age-old question that has bewildered humans for many generations. Before the invention of the cardboard box, us cats were loafing in wooden crates and woven grass baskets. There is a special bond between cat and box that defies explanation. It is generally a cat’s purrogative to be unpredictable in preference and behavior.

As to why one feline might find joy in an expensive catnip stuffed mouse and another may be content with a rogue piece of ribbon, we may never know. If you’re looking to enrich your own resident cat, I can recommend choosing something that introduces a new hiding spot, an unusual texture, or a desirable scent. Keep in mind that your furry friend is generally more impressed with novelty than expense. Save your money for high quality kibble and DIY kitty’s toys. 


Hear Meowt:

Cat says it’s normal and natural for humans to have different purreferences. While one may find a flowing mustache offensive, another may think it the height of beauty. One cat may be enchanted by a cardboard box, another may only be tempted by a rubber mouse. Let’s embrace our differences instead of letting them divide. 🐾

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Actual credentialed journalist (retired)
29 days ago

Hang on, first writer is surprised to have already received an invitation for a wedding happening late this coming summer? Like, not even 6 months away? That’s about the LEAST amount of notice one can give and still reasonably hope to get people to their wedding. How close to the date was the writer expecting to be invited?